Finding the Silver Lining in our Favourite Worst

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Let’s do an activity together today. Think about your favourite colour, your favourite flower, favourite stress buster, favourite movie, favourite place to hang out, favourite comfort food, favourite bully, favourite embarrassment, favourite pain. Did you get stuck up on the last three favourites I asked you to think about? Well don’t be fazed, hang in there! I’ll tell you why.

Once I asked a close friend to tell me seven favourite spots in his house with a special memory attached to it, and he asked me, ‘Can this favourite place be somewhere I cried?’ That got me thinking that why is it that every favourite of ours is attached to something that makes us happy, why can’t it be something that taught us life lessons through the pain.

Don’t get lost in the confusion yet, I will tell you exactly what I mean. You see, the word favourite has its roots in the Latin word ‘favere’ which means ‘to show kindness to’ and the past participle of the Italian word ‘favorire’ which means ‘to favour’.

So basically what that means is, that middle school bully who taught you to stand up for yourself, that toxic ex friend or partner that helped you create the standards you now have for yourself, that desk table you keep jabbing your toe at, all of that can be your favourites too. Ask me why? Because those inconsiderate people and those painful memories did you a favour- they made you who you are today- the strong, confident and compassionate human being.

And if you think you are not there yet, let’s do a little activity together. I’ll call it- ‘Finding the silver lining’.

Take a piece of paper or your phone if that’s convenient and answer the following questions-

PS: When I say favourite, I mean the one that did you the biggest favour in making you the best version of yourself today. And when I ask why, you may try to recall the favour they did to you (in terms of the life lessons you learnt through them)

  1. What is my favourite most embarrassing moment of my life and why?

  2. What is that one thing about me that I can only thank my favourite worst person in my life for developing in me?

  3. What did I learn from my favourite illness experience?

  4. What is my favourite dumbest mistake that I promise to never repeat?

  5. What is the favourite worst thing ever done to me that I will never do to anyone else? Because I know, I have the power to be the better person.

Bonus question: What is the favourite thing about me that never changed despite all the pain I have been through in all these years?

Always remember, there is a reason why all things and people happen to us- the good, the bad and the ugly. And it will never be about what they did to us, it will always be about how we took it and what we learnt from it. So here’s to the universe, Thank you for giving us the gift of life to crib about. May we learn to treat ourselves better! Amen!

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